Mortal Fusion

Spiritual Superglue

The mortal fusion
of spirit with flesh
— Superglue

The word that Origen was casting about for when he tried to describe how deeply merged with the flesh is the spirit hadn’t quite surfaced yet, and that word is Superglue.

I am not sure when, precisely, that glue was so generously applied, or by what or whom, but it sure was applied and it sure cured fast enough, and I haven’t been able to separate spirit (me) from flesh (my body) since.

Well, I take that back, I did separate twice. Once under ether anesthesia (they were setting a broken arm) when in the middle of the procedure they (talk about bad planning) ran out of ether and I kind of woke up before they had scrambled up some more of that ghastly stuff. My recollection is of returning to this solar system, passing Jupiter on my rush back to Earth, and then the next drop hit, and I flew right back into ether-induced oblivion again.

I was ten years old and I told no one about this.

The second time was just after lovemaking with my at-the-time girlfriend. Early 1969. Winter. Suddenly, just after orgasm and literally out of nowhere (or out of nothing recognizable or definable at any rate) I am seized by utter revulsion at the animalistic bestiality of the act (which only moments ago had been pure manifestation of love). And I screamed (silently) a wish: “Out!”.

And I wished this so hard, so with my entire being that the universe took notice and cooperated, the superglue lost its footing and I sailed up and out into the universe. I found myself miles and miles up in the winter sky, relieved and confused in equal measure. Then, barely seconds later, the earth-elevator tracked me down, seized me, and rushed me down the chute straight into my body with an almost “plop”.

This elevator suction is more real than the ascension, which was instant; the chute journey took time — yes, only seconds, but even seconds of speed-falling are measurable and are time.

Unrelieved but just as confused I looked at my girlfriend. Had she noticed? No, deep in happy aftermath all was well with her.

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